I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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