I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
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