3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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