I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
There are 144 bottles of wine in my mother's pantry. She just shrugged her shoulders and said it was for the wine pong tournament on Christmas Day.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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