But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
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