Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Just called the consul general of France "dude"
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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