the new term for farting is butt boxing.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I was 100% done.. I used my vibrator while eating cold pizza. Shit was magical.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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