The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
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