i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
Randomize
