Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
