he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
