Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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