Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
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