Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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