Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
this hospital has no fireball
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
