I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
I am watching the CFL at a Hooters in Texarakana. I made a poor life choice at some point that led me here.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Randomize
