he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
21 Times Karma Showed These People Not to Mess Around
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?