Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Don't forget I'm 20 now

  (1-586): View more from Michigan

  I liked you more when you were 19

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  (586): Don't forget I'm 20 now (1-586): I liked you more when you were 19 http://tfl.nu/sj6s
  Replies (1) Good night (947) Bad night (1129)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.

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  (314): shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to. http://tfl.nu/ryqs
  Replies (9) Good night (4523) Bad night (1746)
• Favorite

  (636): View more from Missouri

  Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night

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  (636): Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night http://tfl.nu/yir7
  Replies (23) Good night (3396) Bad night (1680)
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.

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  (812): And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god. http://tfl.nu/4xu8
  Replies (3) Good night (1319) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high

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  (814): You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high http://tfl.nu/8t28
  Replies (7) Good night (1369) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.

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  (760): Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now. http://tfl.nu/d97x
  Replies (6) Good night (776) Bad night (1663)
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU

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  (847): YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU http://tfl.nu/vl39
  Replies (7) Good night (2279) Bad night (700)
• Favorite

  (985): View more from Louisiana

  Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.

  (504): View more from Louisiana

  This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.

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  (985): Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers. (504): This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot. http://tfl.nu/gotr
  Replies (2) Good night (1015) Bad night (543)
• Favorite

  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.

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  (405): Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month. http://tfl.nu/0lcc
  Replies (3) Good night (753) Bad night (458)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Explain the King Dong next to my face.

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  (570): Explain the King Dong next to my face. http://tfl.nu/zscw
  Replies (2) Good night (489) Bad night (312)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."

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  (+61): I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight." http://tfl.nu/s0wa
  Replies (7) Good night (504) Bad night (317)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am

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  (724): He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am http://tfl.nu/u9dt
  Replies (3) Good night (552) Bad night (343)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water

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  (614): You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water http://tfl.nu/21tc
  Replies (1) Good night (1284) Bad night (395)
• Favorite

  (607): View more from New York

  In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.

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  (607): In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe. http://tfl.nu/9256
  Replies (2) Good night (285) Bad night (651)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.

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  (425): Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together. http://tfl.nu/03kk
  Replies (4) Good night (474) Bad night (188)

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