Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Randomize
