wanna go halves on a baby?
So I just saw a commercial for tickle me Elmo furry gloves. And I thought hmm I bet I could jerk off with those. Is that a sign of deepseated charachter issues?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Randomize