Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Dude, seriously, fucking stop introducing me as "Thomas, with the dick piercing." you are the worst wingman ever.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
