Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
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