Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Send us your Text From Last Night!
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.