No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
I don't need romance, I need cheese sticks
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina