I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
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Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.