My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
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booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous