are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported