It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize