i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
then he tried to convert me to islam
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
Post-sex chicken soup was such a good idea. It's been like an hour and I'm still applauding myself
These 27 People Had No Idea What They Were Doing When It Came To Sex
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.