Texts From Last Night

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant

(617): View more from Massachusetts

then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.

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(617): he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant (617): then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him. http://tfl.nu/q2li

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.

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(215): I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons. (267): I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner. http://tfl.nu/vxtv

Replies (12) Good night (1033) Bad night (4514)
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(239): View more from Florida

Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?

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(239): Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song? http://tfl.nu/r0ur

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(519): View more from Ontario

You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.

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(519): You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night. http://tfl.nu/cmtj

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(502): View more from Kentucky

i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.

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(502): i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me. http://tfl.nu/n2du

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(651): View more from Minnesota

Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.

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(651): Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad. http://tfl.nu/pphf

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show

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(202): Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show http://tfl.nu/lemk

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(925): View more from California

If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.

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(925): If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying. http://tfl.nu/0bns

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(616): View more from Michigan

it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.

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(616): it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina. http://tfl.nu/ij8w

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(818): View more from California

I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed

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(818): I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed http://tfl.nu/k0bk

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(817): View more from Texas

You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.

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(817): You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target. http://tfl.nu/enj6

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(971): View more from Oregon

There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.

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(971): There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home. http://tfl.nu/78m4

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(360): View more from Washington

I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.

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(360): I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high. http://tfl.nu/uw52

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.

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(610): I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer. http://tfl.nu/q9nz

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.

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(978): Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war. http://tfl.nu/fra3

Replies (11) Good night (832) Bad night (3361) Order T-Shirt

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