Texts From Last Night

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low

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(615): Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low http://tfl.nu/4tyo

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(315): View more from New York

Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.

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(315): Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages. http://tfl.nu/62kk

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(580): View more from Oklahoma

White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.

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(580): White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy. http://tfl.nu/gb3d

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(585): View more from New York

This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.

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(585): This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation. http://tfl.nu/p6rk

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(504): View more from Louisiana

so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads

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(504): so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads http://tfl.nu/yn7g

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(619): View more from California

Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.

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(619): Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it. http://tfl.nu/cnbd

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(706): View more from Georgia

Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.

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(706): Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze. http://tfl.nu/gtjj

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen

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(978): Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen http://tfl.nu/ycl6

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(908): View more from New Jersey

The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.

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(908): The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels. http://tfl.nu/nz1k

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(513): View more from Ohio

Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?

(1-513): View more from Ohio

Every day of my life.

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(513): Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer? (1-513): Every day of my life. http://tfl.nu/2brt

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(310): View more from California

we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again

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(310): we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again http://tfl.nu/lt5n

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(760): View more from California

I wish they had nachos that got you drunk

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(760): I wish they had nachos that got you drunk http://tfl.nu/1jvf

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(336): View more from North Carolina

He asked me if I "almost moaned"

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(336): He asked me if I "almost moaned" http://tfl.nu/8ba0

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(314): View more from Missouri

So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.

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(314): So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs. http://tfl.nu/yiuw

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(905): View more from Toronto

Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..

(1-905): View more from Toronto

With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.

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(905): Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina.. (1-905): With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there. http://tfl.nu/fkqx

Replies (34) Good night (19528) Bad night (2028)

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