Texts From Last Night

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(979): View more from Texas

I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar

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(979): I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar http://tfl.nu/uc7h

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(845): View more from New York

Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.

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(845): Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian. http://tfl.nu/smlz

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(904): View more from Florida

How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.

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(904): How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face. http://tfl.nu/e61v

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(478): View more from Georgia

I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?

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(478): I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/kb80

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(847): View more from Illinois

Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.

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(847): Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over. http://tfl.nu/gmxm

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(706): View more from Georgia

so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess

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(706): so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess http://tfl.nu/py20

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(954): View more from Florida

Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.

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(954): Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese. http://tfl.nu/zywb

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(541): View more from Oregon

She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it.

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(541): She told me I was starting to look like a mermaid with herpes and I needed to stop it. http://tfl.nu/jrtc

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(203): View more from Connecticut

have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

omg every time its on

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(203): have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj (1-203): omg every time its on http://tfl.nu/6fsg

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(423): View more from Tennessee

By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.

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(423): By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves. http://tfl.nu/ijd4

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(847): View more from Illinois

You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.

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(847): You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more. http://tfl.nu/i4ry

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(540): View more from Virginia

woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft

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(540): woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft http://tfl.nu/ob1j

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(713): View more from Texas

I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?

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(713): I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit? http://tfl.nu/mgmc

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(585): View more from New York

Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.

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(585): Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories. http://tfl.nu/56hq

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore

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(405): Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore http://tfl.nu/6icm

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