Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
Pretty sure the purpose of joining wine clubs isn't to drink the 2 bottles they send you each month IN THE SAME NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye