Texts From Last Night

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(513): View more from Ohio

Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?

(1-513): View more from Ohio

Every day of my life.

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(513): Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer? (1-513): Every day of my life. http://tfl.nu/2brt

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(310): View more from California

we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again

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(310): we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again http://tfl.nu/lt5n

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(760): View more from California

I wish they had nachos that got you drunk

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(760): I wish they had nachos that got you drunk http://tfl.nu/1jvf

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(336): View more from North Carolina

He asked me if I "almost moaned"

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(336): He asked me if I "almost moaned" http://tfl.nu/8ba0

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(314): View more from Missouri

So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.

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(314): So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs. http://tfl.nu/yiuw

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(905): View more from Toronto

Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..

(1-905): View more from Toronto

With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.

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(905): Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina.. (1-905): With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there. http://tfl.nu/fkqx

Replies (34) Good night (19529) Bad night (2028)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes

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(412): i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes http://tfl.nu/hjgx

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.

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(615): Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree. http://tfl.nu/pq0u

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(651): View more from Minnesota

It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.

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(651): It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits. http://tfl.nu/7qz9

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(360): View more from Washington

he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.

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(360): he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me. http://tfl.nu/9e4p

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(989): View more from Michigan

I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.

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(989): I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS. http://tfl.nu/9dm1

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(585): View more from New York

even my farts smell like vagina

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(585): even my farts smell like vagina http://tfl.nu/9cib

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

those are such fre$h shoes

(1-508): View more from Massachusetts

going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign

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(508): those are such fre$h shoes (1-508): going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign http://tfl.nu/bk8p

Replies (29) Good night (1230) Bad night (3593)
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(614): View more from Ohio

Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.

(1-614): View more from Ohio

I had better be fucking involved with step four.

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(614): Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez. (1-614): I had better be fucking involved with step four. http://tfl.nu/poz4

Replies (46) Good night (5230) Bad night (745)
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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...

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(610): Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon... http://tfl.nu/ozcp

Replies (7) Good night (788) Bad night (4867)

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