Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
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I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
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He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
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I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.