Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.