Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
The owner was showing me around and pointed at one of the bars and said "this is the one you're allowed to dance on. I could tell you wanted to ask." DREAM JOB.