Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.