he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Send us your Text From Last Night!
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?