Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
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I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Ps you missed quite a show. I was for some reason whipping my hair back and forth and head butted the tip jar. It shattered and now I have a circular bruise on my forehead. All the bartenders hit the floor to get all the quarters.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
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i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?