I just saw a hot homeless man
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
I'm fucking your sister right now.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"