Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.