you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
27 Common Occurrences Everyone Can Relate To But No One Talks About
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
Is there any chance I can see you without pouring vodka on your head?
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.