We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...