God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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