just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
