I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
I'm sorry I drunk dialed you before realizing that you were already in bed with me.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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