it wasn't lemon gatorade
Dude you need to stop whoring out my boobs. They are for emergencies only.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
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