The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
