All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
My dick has a subreddit
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Randomize
