carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
