My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
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